When this year began, I felt hopeful for a fresh chapter. The previous year had been marked by panic attacks, anxiety from juggling too many commitments, a painful breakup, and a minor identity crisis after settling down.
Yet that “greatest worst year of my life” paved the way for a year where I reshuffled my priorities and committed to building routines. On a personal level, this year was strong.
I halved my travel.
Now I genuinely enjoy waking up, opening my fridge, and making breakfast.
My panic attacks have disappeared.
I’ve been reading much more.
I drink less and cook more.
I joined a gym.
I established routines.
And although my insomnia hasn’t vanished, I’m finally sleeping better.
But no year is flawless.
I swapped one addiction (travel) for another (work). On the road, filling each day with thrilling experiences was easy. But at home, what was I supposed to do? I fell back on the one thing I knew: work. And I worked constantly. I annoyed my team by sending them tasks on weekends. I launched more digital guides and a new edition of my print guide, How to Travel the World on $50 a Day. We redesigned the site. I completed two speaking tours and led three trips.
And in the process, I exhausted both myself and my team.
As this year closes, I’ve realized that while I appreciate the steadiness in my life, by slowing down I sacrificed the very thing I wanted most: time.
Time to learn languages and pick up hobbies. Time to read and unwind. Time to discover New York. Time to date. Time to do whatever I damn well please.
Though I’ve improved at managing time, I still have too many projects running simultaneously. As my friend Steve recently told me, “Matt, I got tired just hearing what you are doing. I can’t imagine what it’s like to actually do it.”
There’s a certain irony in that I preach the importance of carving out time for what matters, yet I haven’t followed my own advice.
The truth is, I’m a workaholic. I’ve been one since childhood. At my 9-to-5, I used to pull 60-hour weeks. I don’t know how to not work.
I think that’s why I love being an entrepreneur. It’s easy to constantly create projects and build things.
But I take it to an extreme: I just work. And then work more. I write, I blog, I start new websites and initiatives.
But I need to stop that. I need to free up time. The average life is only 29,000 days, and as I barrel closer to the statistical halfway point of my own, it’s time to live more purposefully.
So, as I head to Thailand and then New Zealand through January, I’ve decided to take a mini-break from blogging. Honestly, while the panic attacks are gone, the conditions that created them haven’t disappeared.
I need to work on that.
Last year was a revelation. This year was a realization:
This new me is still a work in progress.
One thing I loved about this year was that I finally stayed offline while traveling. I didn’t bring work with me. I allowed myself to fully enjoy the places I visited. I didn’t rush to find an internet connection or get annoyed if one wasn’t available. I want more of that. It makes me love and appreciate travel.
When I’m doing that, travel isn’t work.
This isn’t one of those “omg blogging is so much work so I’m taking a vacation” posts. I still plan to write and be on social media. This is about stepping back and figuring out how to find balance.
I’m not looking for work/life balance.
I’m just looking for balance in general. I want to stop feeling like I’m five minutes away from a panic attack.
While there are two big community announcements coming in January (we’ve been working on them for months and they are freaking awesome—they’re designed to bring people together in real life and talk about travel), new blog posts will be few and far between until I return from New Zealand.
If last year taught me to stay put, this year taught me the need for balance. Multitasking is an illusion, and settling in one place made me realize just how easy it is to fall into “the busy trap” of modern life. The internet, with its 24/7/365 schedule, means without proper restrictions, it’s easy to give it your 24/7/365. And that’s not a good habit to have.
2018 will be a year of focus. It will be the year of stepping out of “the busy trap.” It’s time to learn to say no to things I don’t love and reclaim the world’s most limited and precious resource: time.
(On a final note, thank you for everything. You all are amazing, and I’ve cherished your emails, letters, and random run-ins on the street! Thank you for coming to all the meet-ups! This community is awesome, and I look forward to seeing and meeting more of you in the new year. Thanks for always being there. Have a happy holidays and an amazing new year!)
P.S. – The winner of the free trip around the world contest has been picked. I’ll be announcing it tomorrow. Just have a few more details to work out. Stay tuned!
P.P.S. – I’m hosting a meet-up in Bangkok on Christmas Day! Let’s grab drinks and talk travel. Follow the Facebook event for updates.
The post One Year Later: Lessons, Growth, and the Need to Slow Down appeared first on Nomadic Matt’s Travel Site.
